Unfair Grace

Grace seems like such an unfair thing. 

To have a lifetime of sin and wrongs committed against others, and then to be able to confess your wrongs, to cry out, “I’m sorry!” from the depths of your soul, and be forgiven, seems unfair to those who suffered those wrongs. It seems like we should have to make amends somehow. To recompense those we’ve wronged, those we’ve hurt. That the burden of restitution for our wrongs should lay solely upon us. But that’s not how grace works. And that seems so unfair. 

As my mother lay dying, I find myself going back over all the times I hurt her. All the wrongs I committed, the treachery and selfishness. All the broken things. As I work through the grief process and the toll of loss…loss of what was and what wasn’t…I have so many “I’m sorry”s to say that she can’t hear. But the Lord hears. The Lord sees. I ask Him to see me in my nakedness. See me exposed before Him and wash me clean. I ask for the grace that seems so unfair. 

We all need this seemingly “unfair” grace. We all need this great equalizer which has been graciously imparted to us through the suffering and death of our Lord. Because that’s one of the things the cross accomplished: “unfair” grace. When we deserve judgement and we deserve to have to make restitution for our wrongs, the cross gives us the ability to cry out for forgiveness and for forgiveness be given, no matter how many wrongs we’ve committed, because Christ makes that restitution on our behalf. So great is His love for me. So great is His love for you. 

What a glorious “unfair” grace we’ve been given. As for God, His way is perfect. 

(Eph 1:7) In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace.

(Acts 20:24) However, I consider my life worth nothing to me; my only aim is to finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me – the task of testifying to the good news of God's grace.

(Heb 4:16) Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

(James 4:6) But He gives more grace. Therefore it says, "God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble."

Lord Of The Valley, Lord Of The Mountainside

“After He had sent them away, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray. When evening came, He was there alone…”

For all intents and purposes, men build far more cities and towns in valleys than they do on mountainsides. Jesus could have prayed anywhere, but we are told that He climbed a mountainside and there He found Himself alone. Perhaps because men are less inclined to climb mountainsides, and more inclined to settle in valleys.

It is not that we cannot pray in the valley. We can. But we are not meant to settle there. If we stay in the valley, we only see ourselves surrounded by looming obstacles. We see only the crookedness of the path, rather than the straightened portion stretching out ahead, because we cannot see what lies in the distance, we only see what lies directly before us. Indeed, there are times in which we need to examine and ponder what lies directly before us, yet to dwell there too long is to become blinded by the “now” and have no vision of the “to be.”

Thus, there are times when we may find ourselves in the valley, pondering and praying about the “now.” And there are times when we will need to climb the mountainside and find ourselves alone, praying for a vision of “to be.” Yet we are not meant to build a city in the valley, nor make a home on the mountainside. 

We are meant to dwell with Christ, Who is Lord of both the valley and the mountainside.

(Matt 14:22,23) Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of Him to the other side, while He dismissed the crowds. After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by Himself to pray. Later that night, He was there alone…

(Ps 23:4,5) Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.

(John 16:32,33) “Look, an hour is coming and has already come when you will be scattered, each to his own home, and you will leave Me all alone. Yet I am not alone, because the Father is with Me. I have told you these things so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take courage; I have overcome the world!”

It’s Okay To Struggle

 

“Struggling” doesn’t mean “failing”…

One of my students has been particularly down lately. A lot of changes are happening in this student’s life, and change can make us feel afraid of the unknown. This student has also encountered a lot of new academic material this year, particularly in my class, and challenges often tend to make us feel frustrated. As this student and I chatted during break, one of the things I asked during our conversation was, “How’s school going?” And the student responded, “I’m struggling.” 

And I looked this student square in the eyes and said, “Perhaps…..but struggling is not failing. It’s okay to struggle.”

(John 16:33) I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.

Where Can I Flee

David, while meditating on God’s sovereignty and ubiquity, asks, “Where can I go from Your Spirit? Where can I flee from Your presence?” 

Of course, these are rhetorical questions, as he well knows that the answer is, “nowhere.” Jesus said, “Yet I am not alone because the Father is with Me.” He said this to His apostles whose time of abandoning Him was near. The hour when each would be scattered, “and you will leave Me all alone…” 

Jesus was well-acquainted with loneliness, yet it never consumed Him because He knew He was never truly alone. He knew the heavenly truth that the Father dwells in our “now”s and our “to be”s. There is no life in our past, for it only exists in eternal record. God does not dwell where there is no life, He dwells in the present and in the future. He dwells in the future because “He goes before you,” and He dwells in the present because He “will be with you.” This deuteronomical promise is for our “now”s and our “to be”s. 

Loneliness is not predicated upon proximity, for one can feel loneliness in a crowd. Loneliness springs forth from the inability to relate. Jesus began His long walk to Golgotha as soon as He began His public ministry. As the months and weeks passed, the crowds dwindled. And when it came time to die for the sins of mankind, there was no human on earth who could truly relate, no human who could understand, and Jesus found Himself alone in the crowd. Yet He was not alone because His Father dwelled in His “now” and His “to be.”

Oh Lord, where can I go from Your Spirit? Where can I flee from Your presence? Nowhere. For You dwell eternally in all my “now”s and my “to be”s. 

(Deut 31:7,8) Then Moses called for Joshua and said to him in the presence of all Israel, “Be strong and courageous, for you will go with this people into the land that the LORD swore to their fathers to give them, and you shall give it to them as an inheritance. The LORD Himself goes before you; He will be with you. He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid or discouraged.”

(John 6:64-66) However, there are some of you who do not believe.” (For Jesus had known from the beginning which of them did not believe and who would betray Him.) Then Jesus said, “This is why I told you that no one can come to Me unless the Father has granted it to him.” From that time on many of His disciples turned back and no longer walked with Him.

(John 14:16-18) And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Advocate to be with you forever—the Spirit of truth. The world cannot receive Him, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him. But you do know Him, for He abides with you and will be in you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.

Overflowing Pools

All that I know of the Lord has been given, not gained. 

When I close my eyes and reach out into the darkness, when I grope into the vast unknown, I grasp nothing. My hands always return to me empty. Yet when I sit and wait upon the Lord, I receive. He pours Himself in from above, like a brook pouring into a pool. The pool does not fill itself, it simply receives, yet it is always full. Not because it works so very hard to be full, but because it has learned how to wait and receive. 

We do not understand God because we figure Him out. We understand God because He reveals Himself to us. God has made a creature capable of comprehending Him. What a marvelous thing. As the Lord peels back layer after layer of the creature’s heart, He gets to the substance hidden deep within: the desire to know Him. “One thing I have asked of the Lord…” David says. One thing. He asks for one, single solitary thing: “That I may dwell in the house of the Lord to gaze upon His beauty and contemplate Him.” Proximity to God for the purpose of knowing Him and worshiping Him— that is the only worthy desire in the human heart. 

The Lord gives…

I give you my body and my blood to atone for your sin (Luke 22:19,20)

My peace I give to you (John 15:27)

I give eternal life (John 10:28)

I give food that will endure (John 6:27)

I will give you a new heart and a new spirit (Ex 36:26)

I give you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy (Luke 10:19)

I give you the kingdom (Luke 12:32)

…and we are called to receive. 

Lord, teach us to receive 

That which is poured out from above

That we may be pools of living water

Overflowing with incorruptible love

O Lord, make me a pool 

A pool that is filled by Your hand  

A pool that cries out, “Lord I cannot…

..but O Lord, I know that You can!”

Lord, teach us to wait

To wait as You show us your ways 

That we may learn of Your faithfulness 

As we follow You all of our days

(Ps 27:4) One thing I have asked of the LORD; this is what I desire: to dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the LORD and seek Him in His temple.

Dead Branches

There are many dead branches still attached to the tree. These branches assume that because they are still attached to the tree, that they are a part of the tree. They are not. They will be pruned by the hand of the Lord and burned. 

Our Lord’s mind toward us is corporate, always, because as the Body of Christ our destiny and make-up are corporate. However, His dealings with us right now are personal and individual. He is building His temple living stone by living stone, and those stones are masoned and set individually. The winnowing fork causes upheaval, tossing grain into the wind for separation to take place. The chaff goes in the direction of the wind, but the grain falls onto solid ground. The grain is indeed falling into heaps, but we have yet to be gathered into the storehouse. Selah. 

(1 Pet 2:5; Eph 2:20-22; Matt 3:12)

Be careful of those who have made a ministry of criticism, those who mistake reviling and slander for Spirit-guided reproach. For the wisdom from above is indeed first pure, then peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and of good fruits, impartial, and sincere. Selah. 

(James 3:17; Ps 44:15,16; Ps 109:27-29)

Be very careful who you listen to in these days of spiritual treachery, for these are not our days of spiritual glory but of spiritual humiliation. Be wary of the Peters, who speak emphatic “You shall..”s, yet are oblivious that the entirety of their ministrations in the name of the Lord are built not on the concerns of God, but the concerns of men. Selah. 

(Luke 8:18; John 13:8; Matt 16:22,23; Phil 2:8)

Be careful that the light in you is not darkness. Perception is the prism of the heart. Many are focused upon the faults in the matrix and the lens through which they look only darkens their heart. Let your gaze be set singly upon the Beloved, then your perception will be healthy and full of light. Selah. 

(Luke 11:34,35; 2 Cor 3:18)

Be careful that you do not follow men of empty words nor men of strong words. For the Lord is not raising up men in this day, but humbling them. A disciple is not above his Master, and it pleased the Lord to crush His own Son. For in suffering, our Lord learned obedience. And so shall it be with His disciples as well. Selah. 

(Luke 6:40; Is 53:10; Heb 5:8; Prov 17:27)

Be careful that you are faithful in the little things. Those who walk in the flesh seek the extraordinary, yet the Spirit of the Lord dwells in the ordinary. For it is in the ordinary things of life in which a person’s character is revealed. A soul is tempered through a trickle of tedium far more than a torrent of travail. Selah. 

(Luke 16:10; James 1:2,3)

Be careful then, how you walk, not as unwise but wise. Be careful how you listen, whoever has wisdom will be given more, and whoever does not have wisdom, even what they think they have will be taken from them. Be careful how you build, for if you lay the foundation and are not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule you. For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ. Selah. 

(1 Cor 3:11; Eph 5:15; Mark 4:25; Luke 14:29)

Be careful that you are not a dead branch that will be cut off, but living branch abiding in the Lord to bear fruit. 

(John 16:2-6; Rom 11:19-22)

Just Shine

Just shine. 

If we think that a flower’s purpose is to be observed and enjoyed by humanity in some measurable way, then there would be an awful lot of flowers on this planet that bloomed in vain.   A flower in the desert is still beautiful whether someone observes its beauty or not. A flower’s beauty and purpose is not intrinsically linked to human observation. The same holds true for those who reflect the Lord’s beauty. 

As we grow in our understanding of the Lord, one of the more difficult human notions we will wrestle with crucifying, is the notion that if a thing does something, it does so for a discernible purpose. For many of us, “purpose” is a subtle idol. The sheer notion of something not having a humanly discernible purpose causes us to eyeball the ledge over the abyss of nihilism. What is the purpose of unseen beauty in the desert? Our flesh will fight to find an answer to this question, but our spirit must learn to rest in the notion that there may be no humanly discernible answer. 

Sometimes, all you will be called to do is just shine. To shine unobserved, unrecognized, unacknowledged. To bloom and to be beautiful in a place where no one around you is capable of discerning your beauty. And you will struggle with the tempting notion that you have no purpose. That your shining is in vain because it is unobserved. But you must remember that God’s beauty is not determined by observation. His beauty just is. For no particular reason at all…

…so it’s okay for you to just shine. 

(Prov 25:2) It is the glory of God to conceal a matter and the glory of kings to search it out.

(Deut 29:29) The hidden things belong to the LORD our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our children forever, so that we may follow all the words of this law.

(Rom 11:33) Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable his judgments, and his paths beyond tracing out!

(Is 30:15) This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says: “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it.